3 Stages of an Initiatory Experience

Stepping into Ceremony
​When we are well prepared and present to intention,
we set the stage to safely step back and allow healing to move through us
without trying to control or struggle toward a perceived goal;
opportunities unfold to perceive medicines and divine wisdom
greater than we can imagine.

An Initiatory Experience
An initiation marks a distinct time of "before" and "after". The kind of experience that, at its extreme, will feel like a complete life over-haul, almost like we have been reborn or achieved a new level of depth/height in awareness. Everything is somehow different or has shifted in a fundamental or cellular way.

Often it is a rite of passage, deep ceremony, intense personal medicine work, vision quest, or healing event that creates a significant shift in the way we relate to and experience the world. It steps us into a new phase of life or welcomes us into a community previously unavailable to us. It applies also to unplanned events like serious illness, accident, or tragedy, as well as natural life stages such as birth, puberty, menarche, labour/birth/parenthood, coupling/uncoupling, menopause, eldership,  and death.

As I have learned it, there are 3 distinct phases to an Initiation.
Severance. Threshold. Integration.
Others may have different names or words to describe them, but the essence seems consistent in my experiences and observances so far.

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​Severance
The preparation phase. This is the lead up to the experience, and is when the healing work actualy begins. Sometimes as early as the moment when we commit to the opportunity. We go through a phase, consciously or not, of acts of letting go of our life as we know it, saying Goodbye to all that is familiar, releasing our grip on the anchors that make us feel stable - patterns, beliefs, relationships, perceived goals and desires, daily constructs, ways of relating, ways of being, ways of thinking - and cutting all ties to the way things are.

If you recognize you are in the Severance stage, you can support and deepen this process by:

• Bringing awareness to the phase you are experiencing
• Observance. Take notice of what theme is present. What situations might be at hand that bring you to this crux time? Are there synchronicities that you are noticing?
• Mindfully acknowledging the last time you touch something before you head off. That when you see it again, you will have a new perspective and be fundamentally changed from holding the medicine and wisdom of your experience. The same for when you see someone for the last time before you go. Part with them in a meaningful way. You are releasing all that "has been" to make way for the more harmonious.

Threshold
This is where we cross over from the "before" to the "after". It is the Experience that changes us or the culmination of experiences that leads us to a pivotal threshold or doorway to step through. It may be marked by ceremony, ritual, vision quest, dark night(s) of the soul, a period of deep healing, or it may not even be fully recognized while in the thick of it - particularly when without the witnessing of community or when the experience(s) are viewed as trauma without resulting gifts.

When in this stage, you might support and deepen the experience by:

• Bringing awareness to the medicinal purpose of what you are experiencing. This is the dissolved, mush state of the not-yet-butterfly caterpillar in the cocoon phase.
• Being gentle with yourself
• Allowing the experience of ALL the feelings, sensations, thoughts, and flashes of intuition and vision. All the emotional highs and lows. All the physical discomforts and tangible revelling. Treating it all with the same level of honour and holding them lightly to more easily pass through and transform.
• Be wary of distraction. If at home this might look like Netflix binging, busy work, social media, imbibing in alcohol or unhealthy use of plant medicines, or otherwise keeping your awareness away from the raw and present. If away in ceremony, it might look like excessive note taking, or hours spent journaling. Perhaps checking the clock, talking to other participants, deflection with humour (not to be confused with healthy levity),  fidgeting or movement without purpose
• If fasting or a dieta is not part of your Threshold, eating foods that feel "clean" in your body and drinking plenty of water or herbal teas
• Draw on your personal spiritual practice. Seek council with elders and spirit guides alike. Rely on tools that are tried and true for you

Integration
Often considered the hardest part, and sadly too often overlooked - integration occurs when we are able to Return to our usual life and keep the gifts we have acquired intact. We are challenged with bringing our internal shifts outward to affect change in our day-to-day living and resist falling back into old ways of thinking, reacting, and being. Many times this transition isn't easy, might be messy, and perhaps feels a bit chaotic as things shake up in order to fall into more harmonious places. Touching in with any community, elders, or teachers that held us through the Threshold phase can be a wellspring of anchoring resources.
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When in this stage, you might support and deepen the experience by:

• Making hard choices and having tough conversations. The theme or situations identified during the Severance phase is a clue here, notice if things intensify into intolerable levels and create the urge or push to make significant changes. You don't have to rush or force this one. If it happens, it will organically and deep down you will know what the answer is even if your mind wants to argue or complicate it.
• Keep reflecting back to the insights and medicines retrieved during the Threshold. Trust the work has already been underway and you are halfway there, or almost done.

A few years ago I wrote some practical, hands-on, tips and suggestions for integrating the medicines from the Threshold, and bringing all of the unseen, personal, inner work Out into our mundane living experience. If you would like more on the Integration phase, find yourself post-ceremony or have recently undergone a personal healing session, please read "Integration ~ the often overlooked time after soul-work".
If you would like personal and direct support as you move through any of these stages, you are welcome to send me an email at info@3foldbalance.com or book a consultation.